Nonsense of Google Adsense

We all are aware of Google advertisements which are claimed to be context specific and content sensitive. This prompts the users to click on advertisements and thereby generating revenues for the site and Google.

Yesterday I wrote a letter (email of course) full of love to my girlfriend using gmail and got stunned after seeing the advertisements on the page.

Why Mommy is a democrat
The book George Bush doesn’t want your kids to read!
Gosh! This is a love letter before marriage. Where do the kids come from? I do not have any, need to ask her seriously this time if she has another affair and having kids. Google might be right. And also, who writes love letter to his wife? Do I look like a fool who would write a letter to my child’s Mom. And Mommy is neither a democrat nor republic we live in India fool. Did not you realize that?

Relationships
Predict the exact name of who you should have a relationship with
I already have the time of life with the girl I am writing to. Why would I repeat the same mistake again by predicting somebody else’s name? No more relationships as I had enough of it. If I were to predict something I would like to predict about good things.

Surrogacy Agency
Become a surrogate mother. Very generous compensation.
Mother f****r!! Why do not you ask your girlfriend to do this and give your compensation to her? God, is there any thing else to show me? No where in the article did I write about our kids (obviously would be) but still Google could predict my girlfriend would like to do this a hobby. Context Aware Advertisements, Huh!!!

The Money Savvy Pig
The piggy bank for the 21st century
This sounds bit logical but Yuk what a disgusting name for a bank. Yes, my bank is for the 16th century. You are the one. You are the one I was looking for just get your name right Mr. Pig. Is it a bank or some cheap commerce of thugs to loot our earnings?

Kid Allowance Contract
Parenting Help – Allowances system for children ages 6-18
This is too much of pressure now to have kids. I should ask my girlfriend to think about it seriously now. It is not only us but it is Google also who wants it. And Google also has a plan for allowancing till they are eighteen. I am amazed by the foresightedness and insight they have shown for my kids and my family. Thank you Google.

Chocolate Nursing Mother
Mother and child in fine chocolate. Goddesses sculptures in chocolate.
Now who needs it in India? I don’t have any child to gift him his sculpture in chocolate and feel elated about being the best father in the world. Even if I get it done for my girlfriend who is still not a mother (as far as I know her) and take that sculpture to India what is the guarantee that it wont melt and not got licked by a street dog? No this wont work for me.

Fire Your Boss
Own a dry cleaning bus. Name brand! Turnkey low $. No experience need – we train
I am fortunate that my boss does not read my blogs otherwise I would no longer be working as he would have fired me after reading this. This is the height of stupid advertisements one could bear. This is bizarre, this is inhuman, this is insane, and this is crazy. I don’t want to become a driver and don’t want to leave my white collar job. Is it clear to folks at Google?

And if that was not enough Google had more links for me to dig in:

Child Parents>>
Overweight Children>>
Marriage>>
Parenting Children>>

I never knew that writing an email to a girl friend invokes such a complicated program in Google’s server that it goes beyond the realm of context and starts pushing the boundaries where the future crushes the common sense and makes logical things look funny and stupid. And at Google they still say: “AdWords ads that are relevant to site content pages.”
Somebody please tell them.

Pancakes with Sauce – Yuk!!!

My housemate Benai, one day during a causal chat revealed a surreal secret. She told me about Krishna my other housemate having a habit of eating pancakes with sauce. She was appalled by the awful act and wanted to validate from me whether it was a common practice in India? How someone could generalize somebody’s specific behavior and presume it as a nation wide phenomenon without any logical justifications and background. I found it bizarre and could not digest the story. “Why would someone do that?” was my reaction.

I closed my eyes and start contemplating the whole scenario. Bingo!!! Finally I got it right when a look through hole was formed in my gray matter because of the continuous stabbing of this off-the-wall thought. Yes it was not pan-cakes that he was eating with sauce but an Indian snack called Dosa.

I breathed a heavy sigh of relief after saving the nation and smiled to myself. Cultural differences huh!!!