God's Nectar

Yes I am writing after such a long time. It is true that for sometime I was tardy and unmotivated to write in black and white. I have been busy for sometime with my work. Two-three days back only I decided that I would write my blog again and would continue doing that without break.

So, finally today I got the chance when Friday, 23 Dec, 2005 has been declared as holiday in my office. Now, I see the advantage of working with an American company. Christmas is on Sunday but the management has decided to prepone the holiday. I am really impressed by the benevolent gesture shown by the management. God knows what have they been cooking up in the back of their minds.

I had come to office to charge my phone. Sounds weird but I keep my charger in office most of the times. Weekend I rely on my friends who use sony mobiles or come to office for an hour or so to do the charging. It might sound completely stupid to someone reading this but bachelors have nothing much in their lives. We get bored working continuously for five days in office, in the same way we bachelors get bored spending two days without the office. Coming to office not only charges my mobile but also my lethargic nerves to stay alive till Monday.

I still have to say why I am writing this? Sometimes I wonder how can I talk so much despite of the fact that I am an introvert person. I guess writing is different from talking or speaking. Nobody listens to when one writes so I can write bullshit if I want.

Milind is not at Sarvesh's place and I was expecting him to be there. I walked all the way to find that the house was locked. I tried calling him but the mobile was unreachable. Somebody has said it rightly that when things start to become bad, they end up after it becomes worst. After making several futile attempts to connect him, finally I got to know that he would be late by an hour.

I did not know what to do. I had already left the office and going back meant to look into the eyes of the security guard and feel embarrassed. I left the office so confidently telling my security guards that I was leaving for the day. They had checked out my name from the muster. Going back was like walking on a burning road without any feet protection. I thought hundred times to give my security guards a good excuse and still not feel embarrassed. Finally I made my way to office after deciding that I had no other option but to come back. I entered the office trying to look as much confident as I can. Poor security guards! They do not even think so much unlike us so called intellectuals. They do not cook all these structured and crooked plans as we intellectuals do. They are very simple. They welcomed me with their ever-humane smile free of contempt, wickedness, and artificialness.

I sat on my seat started the computer and now writing this. That was my story. The story of the broken blog waiting to be assembled back.

I met Neha in the office. She was working as usual on weekends. She suspects that I would go and drink today, as it is Friday. Last Friday only I had made a decision to refrain myself from alcohol till Valentine’s Day except the New Year day when I am supposed to wet my throat a little. She is quite aware of this. Today she put forth a bet that If I could show her to refrain from alcohol for one month she would do whatever I wanted. I do not know why girls do this. Do they really like to take tests or is this a common thing that every Indian girl asks to a guy. This line "I would do anything for you" is so deceptive that you do not know how to respond. You just become speechless. Last time it was Jaya who had asked this. I won the promise also but I still have to ask that what could she do for me. She is out of my life now, but perhaps this bet is a due on her. Now I do not know what would happen if I won my bet again with Neha. Anyway there is nothing you can ask a girl to do even if you win. The sentence itself is so heavy that nothing can be done with it. It is better to have bets for dinner, parties, or icecreams rather than using all these heavy philosophical words that does not make any sense in real life but look good in books only.

Milind has called in the middle of the last paragraph and he is coming back in 15-20 mins. We are going to the hill (Tekri) in IIT. Yesterday I flunked jogging because my legs were paining and I was dying with pain. It seems that my shins are badly injured because of the continuous jogging for last 7-8 days. Therefore, I have decided today with Milind to go for a small trek rather than to jog and torture myself once again. I do not know how safe is this but I will try to take care of myself while going there.

Again I forgot to call my sister Deepa on her birthday. Such a jackass I am, I feel sometimes. I have not called her yet. I was supposed to call her late in the night yesterday but I was killing time at Sarvesh's place. Later in the night when I was coming back I went to Godrej colony with Milind and Sarvesh instead of coming back to my apartment. Sarvesh touched 100 on his speedometer on the connecting road. I felt so scared. It could have been our last journey also, who knows, but life is like this only. There is a thin line between stupidity and bravery. God knows, whether, what Sarvesh did yesterday was bravery or stupidity. The good thing is that I am still alive to write this blog.

On top of it when I reached back my home, I stayed in the car for one more hour. We talked endlessly during that hour with car parked in front of my building. It is true that sometimes we talk stupid nonsense stuff but I feel this is what keeps you alive and helps you keep going with life. It makes you feel light and playful. On the other hand if you start reading intellectual stuff you feel more heavy and lonely because then there is nobody around you to share your solitude. Intellectuals do not waste their time in trivia and keep themselves aloof from friends. Why do they wear this mask of artificiality when even they also somewhere deep in their hearts want to behave like a normal person. Anyway, had this been so simple to understand, life would not be so complex.

I feel now that I have written too much after being flown in this emotional paroxysm of blog writing. Taking off for today. Let me see how long can I refrain myself from God's nectar.