My Republic Day Weekend

And Basanti did not get painted...

It is in human nature to do everything first and take pride in it. Same emotions motivated me to get the tickets for Rang De Basanti. I also wanted to see the movie the first day itself and to describe it later on to the people who are lethargic in taking actions. But sometimes you have to pay for it when you try to churn out things faster than the normal pace.
I wanted to make my Republic day different by starting my guitar classes and to make Rang De Basanti (RDB) possible. I was going to attend my first guitar class with Anoop and Sarvesh. On our way to the class around 10:30 am when we reached near Huma we decided to buy the tickets. Sarvesh and I rushed towards the counter. It was crowded with people desperate to get the tickets before they sold off. I found myself on cloud nine when I got the tickets in my hand.
At 11 pm everybody got assembled at the theatre. We walked to the gate wearing the arrogance of the first day movie watcher. The guard stopped us and gave us a shock of our life when he told us that there was no show at all at 11:30. I ran towards Sarvesh and tried to get the glimpse of the tickets that were visible through the small opening of the black blanket created by the anxious heads. Timing was same except the AM and PM indication, which was overlooked by our excited eyes in the morning. Eyes see what our mind wants to see. We did not get to see the Basanti but we got the experience to live for our lifetime.

Leave me alone!!!

Saturday I came to office as usual to charge my mobile but found Neha’s name in the muster. I as a good friend decided to go back home without disturbing her from her work. I asked the guard to get the charger for me. I did not go inside to disturb her. It is a bad habit to intrude and I never do that. I wanted to meet her and bid hello but refrained myself from it. Day before yesterday she had decided to be left alone on her own and not to be disturbed by anybody. I do not mind her finicky decisions, whimsical nature, impulsive attitude, and wavering temperament between cycles of bad, good, depressing, and happy moods. I know her state of mind. She is going through the hardest times of her life and finds it difficult to decide between good and bad. She needs a friend right now who can be just there with her, to listen her, to speak to her, to laugh with her, to cry with her, to consoler her, and to make her smile and happy. I try to do that whenever I go with her. I try to not to let our conversation dry, try hard to let it go, try to throw jokes and doing stupid things, try hard to not to leave her alone by having dinners and movies her. I wanted to do all this on Saturday also but I left her alone in the gloomy office working alone without even leaving a note of my presence. Did I do a right thing by taking her “leave me alone” advice seriously? Only time will tell…I have known her only for five years. Very short time to know somebody.

The Power of "No"

It was another causal evening walk with Neha when I asked her about “Rang De Basanti” for the weekend. Sometime back she only gave me the idea to watch this movie together. She gave me a firm “No” leaving me perplexed and baffled. Girls go by instincts rather than intellect. Though I could not see the rational in her reply but she justified it with philosophical words like, “stop pushing, leave alone, need time, don’t make it hard for me”. Sometimes I think whether she did psychology or architecture. God what did I do? Just asked for a movie, which was already planned. Since I asked for it, I invariably had given her the power of saying “No”. I realized the power of “No”. Infact she made me to realize that power. Not all “No’s” can become powerful. A “No” from an acquaintance is never powerful because you invariably prepare yourself to listen it. A “No” from a friend” is more powerful than an acquaintance. It gets powerful and more powerful as we hear it from a good friend, a very good friend, lover, fiancée, and ultimately our spouse. It becomes powerful, as the relationship with the person gets stronger. Strong relationship means more trust and dependence.
Powers if not used carefully and cautiously can be destructive and fatal. It goes with the power of saying “No” also. If there is only “No” in a relationship then it signals its end. It should be balanced with “Yes” to counter the power of “No”.
I realized from the experiences of my life that there is no power in saying “No”. You need to be powerful to say, “Yes” not a “No”. “No” is a quick escape route from a situation while “Yes” require you to fight and deal with the situation. “Yes” brings in love, respect, and trust while a “No” brings you hatred, shame and distrust. In your conscience also you feel good after making somebody happy and you feel bad after making him or her sad. You need not to be powerful to say a “No” but for a “Yes” you have to have the powers to control the situations that arise after that. Only a coward will say a “No” and runaway from the situation. A fighter will always accept the challenge.I knew that she needed some time for herself after looking into her eyes. I decided to give up. The good thing that I took out from the discourse that we had was the analysis of “Yes and No” - Two extremes but so close. She is a very sweet girl with a kind heart. She never hurt somebody knowingly. She will become the same person good person soon whom I knew once. It is just a matter of time.